(#172) Are You Kicking the Can Down the Road?

Posted on September 8, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

I have met and worked with highly capable kickers of the can.
They do, however, have grave difficulties managing their decisions.
And that affects everyone around them.

For those who know me, you know I can be a bit retentive. (Those who really know me might ask, “a bit?”)  Maybe that is why procrastination drives me to distraction.  I have felt its effects when people I have worked with procrastinated. More often, I have witnessed the avoidable problems that come from continually kicking the can down the road.

Image: Ambro/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Some situations are minor in the grand scheme of life’s challenges. Like leaving dishes in the sink that do not miraculously disappear—the stack just gets larger. And consequently more work (and a larger commitment of time) waits at a later time. The logic escapes me: I don’t have the time to do a small task now—but I will have more time to do a larger task later.

Students do it with reading assignments and term projects. The eight-week project becomes a two-night project—still eight weeks’ worth of work to do, though.

People do it with their health.  They ignore warning signs from their own bodies. I know people who have reached 50 years of age only to ignore their doctor’s direction to have a colonoscopy.  Every excuse in the world is used. My doctor has told me that it is a highly preventable form of cancer. Yet people will kick that can (no pun intended) down the road.  One friend died this year from colon cancer.

How about the people who face retirement years with less than $10,000 in savings?  High consumption years took precedence over wealth building.

And the list is never-ending:  I’ll look for a more satisfying job next year. I’ll get to the gym next week.  I’ll work on that presentation when the engagement gets closer.  I can wait to caulk and paint the house. And that dead tree in the back yard? Well, I’ll just wait for a storm to take care of it.

It’s not that these people are dullards and lazy.  I have met and worked with highly capable kickers of the can. They do, however, have grave difficulties managing their decisions. Whether out of fear, the inability to face up to tough decisions, inability to prioritize, self-absorption, the search for immediate gratification, or irrational optimism, the procrastinators continually make life difficult for themselves and those around them.  They do not manage well.

Video recommendation for the week:

Manage today.

Think of it this way.  If you were in a relationship with someone would you want to be relegated to “I’ll get to you next week”?  And how many relationships suffer that very fate.  A real problem exists—but we’ll see if it goes away.

A number of problems reside with the kick-the-can-down-the-road syndrome. The kicker of the can:

  • Disrespects and disappoints team members.  When they become negotiable (due to missed or late deadlines, meetings, or phone calls) the kicker has announced that they are not very important.
  • Might love the adrenalin rush, but he creates stress for those around him.
  • Develops a reputation as someone who is difficult to depend upon.
  • May lose opportunities as others experience (or hear) about her penchant to put things off.
  • Could eventually overload himself because as he kicks more cans down the road he believes he can take more on in the short-term. Something has to eventually give. Quality or sanity. Both?
  • Eventually gets to the end of the road.

And it is so avoidable—if the kicker of the can wishes it to be.  Just saying “Stop it!” doesn’t work.

Image: Stuart Miles/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: Stuart Miles/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I have offered strategies in an earlier blog post, so today I will offer one activity I have suggested to groups.  I call it “The Two-Minute Warning.”  For each of your non-negotiable activities on your to-do list block out at least two-minutes. Identify what you can do in just two minutes to get closer to the goal(s).  And then do it.  Tomorrow, do it again.  The next day, another two minutes. Build a habit of action.

The alternative is to procrastinate now and pay later.

Choose well. Live well. Be well—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On Friday, September 13, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Supporting Our Adjunct Faculty: The Forgotten Teachers of Academia.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) with friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in Discipline, Procrastination, Success, teamwork | Tagged , , , , , | 11 Comments

(#171) Thirty-Two Years of Dreams

Posted on September 1, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

I have the chance to be a small part of their collective journeys.
This is not a drill. It’s real life. Their lives.
And after 32 years, my students continue to inspire me.

This week I began my 32nd year of classroom teaching.

I have had people wonder how I can stay fresh going into my 63rd semester. While it is true that syllabi development, essay grading, administrivia, and mind-numbing meetings can be trying and frustrating adventures, something deeper strikes at the heart of why I do what I do. In many respects, I have the best calling in the world.  Every day I have the opportunity to connect with people and to make a difference in their lives.

Each semester a fresh group of students walks on campus chasing their dreams.  Some have a laser-focus on where they want to be; others are not quite so sure.  But all know they want to be at a better place in their lives. They want something more and I have the opportunity to help them bring those rainbows into their kaleidoscopic focus. I have the chance to be a small part of their collective journeys.  And that is a privilege and a responsibility I do not take lightly.  This is not a drill. It’s real life. Their lives.

Photo: Steve Piscitelli

Photo: Steve Piscitelli

Recognizing that the long-term must pass through the short-term, I asked my students to complete the following sentence on the first day of class:   By the end of this semester I will _________________.

While a number of students opted for the grade-focused response of getting all “As” (and there is nothing wrong with that), the vast majority identified goals that touched the various dimensions of their lives.  I have listed some of their responses (in no particular order) below. As I read each, I am reminded that we all have basic goals involving health, relationships, occupation (our calling), and emotional well-being.  How many of these would you be able to include on your short-term list?

  • Have the will to be successful
  • Lose 15 lbs
  • Have a job
  • Have a different job
  • Have a job promotion
  • Be more organized
  • Have a solid relationship
  • Be eating healthier
  • Not procrastinate
  • Establish an exercise routine
  • Prove to family and friends I can do well
  • Have saved money
  • Be a step closer to my dreams
  • Have learned what it takes to be successful in college
  • Be more independent
  • Grown as a person
  • Go to New York for my birthday
  • Complete repairs on a house I just purchased
  • Have saved at least $2,000
  • Have a body fat percentage down to 12%
  • Be living on my own
  • Have my own vehicle
  • Continue to research different careers
  • Do community service
  • Have developed confidence
  • Be able to speak in front of others
  • Be on time
  • Have grown my vocabulary
  • Have an idea of what goes on in the real world
  • Take more responsibility for my life
  • Have a better life for me and my family
  • Have improved my study skills
  • Have managed my priorities
  • Have learned about life choices
  • Have learned how to stay focused
  • Have learned more about myself

We discussed how setting a goal is the easy part. The work comes with goal achieving.  Dreams. Action. Reality. Think of your dreams—and your actions (or inactions). What is your reality?

Video recommendation for the week:

(If the above link does not work on your device, click on this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oV-qNV0Snck.)

It is very easy to become jaded in any job.  No matter what we do for our “living” we can lose sight of why we do what we do (beyond earning a buck).  For me, I am invited in and become a small part of the lives of my students. We influence one another.  I hope to inspire them.

And after 32 years, I know they continue to inspire me.

Choose well. Live well. Be well—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On Friday, September 13, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Supporting Our Adjunct Faculty: The Forgotten Teachers of Academia.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) with friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

 

Posted in creating your future, Dreams, Gratitude, Passion, Purpose, Teaching | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

(#170) Do You Let People Should On You?

Posted on August 25, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

Some of the wisest and most effective mentors I have had,
simply made themselves available. These people—true mentors—will help you
discover and define yourself.

[Note: Information on a free music download toward the end of this post. Enjoy!]

Mentors have had a huge impact on my life. In teaching, publishing, and workshop facilitation, I have been fortunate to learn from masters.  I am always suggesting students find a mentor. The power of such a relationship cannot be overstated.  These people—true mentors—will help you discover and define yourself.

Image: dan/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: dan/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Having said that, please beware of false prophets—the self-appointed life coaches who believe their job is to correct your course.  However well-meaning, they could end up getting in your way. Just like that little person sitting on your shoulder who constantly tells you to play it safe, not do this, and avoid that. They believe they know what is best for you, and they seldom miss an opportunity to bloviate and pontificate.  You know the ones.

Ben Franklin reminded us that “Wise men don’t need advice. Fools won’t take it.”

Some of the wisest and most effective mentors I have had, simply made themselves available. They did not come to me with a list of things I needed to change. They never attempted to mold me into a mini-them. Even when my actions were not how they would approach a situation, they helped me define my journey. Very seldom have I heard my mentors say, “Steve you should do it this way.”

In other words, they recognized my ability—and need—to make my choices, examine my mistakes, and celebrate my triumphs.  They truly were guides whispering in my ear, not someone yelling into a bullhorn telling me I did not measure up to their view of the world.

In short, they did not should on me.

Free Music Download

The you-should-do-this-people of the world inspired my song, I’m Gonna Should On You!  As a gift to you, you can have a free download of the song by going to http://stevepiscitelli.com/Downloads/music-downloads.html. When prompted, type in the password should. This offer will be available until September 1, 2013.   Turn up the speakers and enjoy the song.

Video recommendation for the week:

I will leave you today with a short message from Stedman Graham. I asked him to deliver a message to my classroom scholars. The message is simple—know who you are. Define yourself.

(YouTube link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufKqiAv5D1E)

Choose well. Live well. Be well—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On Friday, September 13, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Supporting Our Adjunct Faculty: The Forgotten Teachers of Academia.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) with friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

 

Posted in Choice, growth | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

(#169) How Bad Do You Want It?

Posted on August 18, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

So, will your dream remain a liketodo or will you turn it into a willtodo?
Practice these four strategies.

Within the next few weeks, college students around the country will report to their respective campuses.  With dreams in their eyes, they have a major choice in front of them:  “What will they do to reach those dreams?”  The “do” is important.  Many people (students and others) have a long list of “liketodos”—but they come up short on the “willtodos.”

Video recommendation for the week:

Pay attention to your vocabulary. Three demotivating words.

You see, the dreaming is the easy part. Anyone can set a goal. When we cut to the chase, though, it comes down to whether or not we take the action needed to achieve the goal.  Are we in it for the long run—or will we fold like the proverbial cheap beach chair as soon as the going gets a little dicey? Setting goals is easy. Achieving them requires effort.

Remember that the intersection of “coulda-woulda-shoulda” is “I didn’t!”

In a recent post, Seth Godin asked a simple question: “Will I see you tomorrow?” That is, is there fortitude behind the dream?

I shared four key strategies with the Early College students this week. I previously posted these under the title of it takes more than academics to succeed in college. I want to revisit these for anyone moving toward a dream. You would do well to practice them. Take a moment right now.  Reflect on one of your dreams. Apply the following:

1. Relationships. A cornerstone of success will be the healthy and nutritious connections you make.  Mentors, coaches, teachers, accountability partners—whatever you call them, build a solid support network. Jettison the toxic folks. Find people who know what you want to know and do what you would like to do.  Be a sponge!  Soak up the wisdom. Be curious! Ask questions. Grow.

2. Resources. Identify resources you have at your disposal. Know the resources you still need. Your relationships will help you here.  For college students, there are so many resources on your campus dedicated to making you successful on your dream journey. You have to do two things: find them and use them.

Image: Stuart Miles/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: Stuart Miles/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3. Priorities. Know what is non-negotiable in your life. What are the must-haves and must-dos on your way to the dream? Don’t betray yourself or your passion.  Move with purpose. Use your relationships and resources to help guide you.  Avoid the quick fix; the easy-way out; the short cuts. Your dream will require effort.

4. Choices.  More specifically, pay attention to the choices you make concerning your well-being and life balance.  Your health (physical, emotional, spiritual, social, intellectual, and financial) needs to be one of those non-negotiables in your life.

So, will your dream remain a liketodo or will you turn it into a willtodo?  How bad do you want it?

Choose well. Live well. Be well—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On Friday, September 13, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Supporting Our Adjunct Faculty: The Forgotten Teachers of Academia.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) with friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in Balance, Choice, Dreams, Goals, priorities | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

(#168) Who is Defining Your Brand?

Posted on August 11, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

Whatever you do this week (month, year and beyond),
make sure it is excellent. How do you stand out and
take control of your brand?

 In an article posted on LinkedIn (“How to Quit Like a Boss”), Liz Ryan describes how a young hotel worker quit his job.  What made the rather mundane event stand out was that this young man did it with the help of a marching band!  Ryan saw it as a stroke of personal-branding genius.

While some may disagree with the method (one friend of mine posted that “being a disrespectful attention-seeker is hardly a role model trait”), it did have an impact on this person’s brand.

The article and video reminded me of a book by Tom Peters.

brand you 50

In Reinventing Work: The Brand You 50 (NY: Alfred A. Knopf, 2001), Peters argues that we are all a package and we must make sure that we take care of the package and the message it sends. He asks:

“Who are you, anyway?  What words and phrases come to mind? 
Skills? Personal traits? What’s distinct? What separates you from
the masses?”  Why should anyone invest in you?”  (47-48)

The “invest” here could mean invest money in your entrepreneurial adventure, hire you for a job, or give you the leadership role on a company or school team.  What is it that makes you stand out from the crowd? The young man with his marching band resignation stood out.  It is up for debate whether that helps or hinders his next (or subsequent) career move. Will he be toasted–or will he be toast?

Photo: Steve Piscitelli

Photo:
Steve Piscitelli

What is not up for debate is that he has created a digital tattoo with the video.  It is now (at least in the foreseeable future) part of the package—the brand—he has created.  (At this writing, the video has nearly 4 million views.  More than 26,000 likes have been tallied; a little over 600 dislikes.)

So what brand are you creating each day? Even if you feel as though you are in a “dull” job, how do you do that job?  Consider a day at work or in the classroom.  Consider the meetings you attend.  What image do others see you portray: bored, engaged, boastful, collaborative, complacent, curious, fretful, negative, optimistic, validating, thoughtful, or self-absorbed? Do you see opportunities where others see humdrum?

Video recommendation for the week:

Our life is the sum or those little actions we consistently do. Yes, we all have bad days; off days. But generally, what is the package you have created for others to see? And are you satisfied with this?

Let’s finish with a short exercise.  Borrowing from Peters’ work, answer the following questions:

  • When people observe you interact in business meetings and personal gatherings, what words or phrases do you think they would use (or do use) to describe you?
  • What distinct skills and personal traits do you have?
  • What separates you from the masses?

Once you write your answers, ask a few trusted colleagues or mentors for feedback. Remember, if you ask for feedback, don’t get angry if you don’t like the what you hear!

I recently read about a company that, to shake things up, required applicants who reached the interview stage to put their resumes into PowerPoint format, present it, and defend it!  (This could be an effective way to interview prospective faculty members.  We would get to see their creativity, presentation skills, ability to think on their feet, and insights into how they see themselves.)  How would you reduce your career history to a PowerPoint presentation? What personal brand would be obvious? What images and words would you use?

Whatever you do this week (month, year and beyond), make sure it is excellent.  Take control of your brand.

Choose well. Live well. Be well—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On Friday, September 13, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Supporting Our Adjunct Faculty: The Forgotten Teachers of Academia.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) with friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in branding | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

(#167) Standout or Get Left Behind

Posted on August 4, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

What can you do this week to become the go-to person, the linchpin—
the difference maker—in the lives of others, and by so doing,
make a huge difference in your life?

linchpinLast week I read (devoured) Seth Godin’s provocative book, Linchpin: Are You Indispensable?   The basic gist: If you report to work each day and do everything you can to fit in, blend in, and play it safe—it’s not very safe.  In fact, Godin argues, the cogs of society make themselves more expendable each day they choose to do nothing than what is expected.   We’ve been brainwashed by “a system where people are terrified to step outside of their lives.” So they do everything to play it safe and “meet spec.” The problem is that when we “meet spec” there is no way to be remarkable and standout. The best we can hope for is to be standardized–just like everyone else. And when we are standardized, why would an organization need to keep us around?

Image: sheelamohan/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: sheelamohan/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Over the course of the last four decades I (like many others) have had to endure drones, cogs and automatons of the work world. You know, these are the people who have never found a rule they do not like. The more boxes they can check off on a clipboard, the happier they are.  They lack curiosity, creativity, and critical thinking skills. Nothing is gray. Everything is black or white (can never be both in their minds.)  They are doing everything by the book. Corporate-speak is all important. Faceless and emotionless people remaining “on point” at all costs.  Hardly, if ever, an individual thought.  Meeting spec., playing it safe, and making themselves dispensable.

Image: digitalart/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: digitalart/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Godin believes the rules have changed in the new economy. The cogs are the ones who are easily replaced.  He urges that you (me) develop skills that make us indispensable.  True, everyone can be replaced. The indispensable ones, though, become tougher to replicate.  They have chosen to stand out for the good of those they serve. They know how to establish and maintain meaningful relationships. Their work becomes art! They have passion and they make things happen for themselves and the people they work with each day.

Godin asks us to imagine a school with the following sign hanging over the front door:

 We train factory workers of tomorrow.
Our graduates are very good at following instructions.
And we teach the power of consumption as an aid for social approval. (p. 42)

Oh, my!  Are we doing that?  Am I doing that?  Good time for a gut check.

Video recommendation for the week:

The people who break out and look at work as an opportunity (instead of an obligation) are the linchpins of the world.  That is what we need to mentor and encourage, says Godin. And we all have gifts that will help us rise above the “play-it-safe” setting.  There are seven contributions (gifts) that all linchpins make to their surroundings.  As you read this list, who comes to your mind? Do YOU come to your mind?  The linchpins of our world:

  • Provide a unique experience/connection between your organization and those you serve
  • Deliver their service/product with creativity
  • Manage, juggle and effectively pull together complex projects
  • Lead the people they serve
  • Inspire their colleagues
  • Have a deep knowledge/understanding about their areas
  • Possess a unique talent.   (p. 218)

Many times what holds us back is little more than our own unsubstantiated fears.  Godin refers to it as the Lizard Brain that constantly throws obstacles in our way. We believe the lizard and then “mortgage an entire irreplaceable day of our life for a few bucks.”

What can you do this week in your life to become the go-to person, the linchpin, the difference maker, in the lives of others, and by so doing, making a huge difference in your life?

 “Every day is a new chance to choose.” Ishita Gupta.

 Choose well. Live well. Be well—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

Tomorrow, August 5, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: “It Takes More than Academics to Succeed in College.”   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) with friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in Being REMARKABLE, Choice, customer service, Goals, influence, Integrity, leadership, Making a Difference, Passion, Personal growth, Personal Wellbeing | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

(#166) It Takes More than Academics to Succeed in College

Posted on July 28, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

I address this week’s blog post directly to college students.
If you know one—especially a first-year or first-generation college student—
please, pass this along.

Nearly two decades ago, a math colleague of mine (Florida State College at Jacksonville, Downtown Campus) passed along a nugget of wisdom that I still remember.  On morning, we shared some of the struggles and challenges many of our students were facing on a daily basis.  While many of the students lacked basic academic skills, all of them had non-academic challenges to address; challenges that presented obstacles to their progress.  My colleague simply stated, “Steve, we teach so much more than math (history, English, or science).”

How true, then—and today. Back on December 9, 2012, I posted advice from my students about how to succeed in college.  You will see that their suggestions focused on basic (non-cognitive) life skills.  And the colleges and universities I have been working with over the past few months consistently asked me to address non-cognitive (“non-academic”) skills that students need to master.

This week, I address my blog directly to college students. If you know one—especially a first-year or first-generation college student—please, pass this along.

Image: phanlop88/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: phanlop88/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

There are no shortcuts when it comes to academic standards.  You have to know how to read, prepare for tests, complete tests, take notes, and glean main points from class lessons.  Basic study skills will help you reach your goal of graduation. You, also, need to pay attention to the following four interrelated areas for personal development. I will follow-up on these in my free webinar on August 5.

Relationships. Your success in large part will be affected by the relationships you build in and out of the classroom.  John Maxwell (leadership expert) has said that we rise to the conversations around us.  Pay attention to the conversations around you. Run from those people who pepper you with defeatist and negative talk.

  • “Audition” or “interview” your classmates. Not in a formal way.  Rather, pay attention to the students in your classes.  Look for clues as to who seems to “get” the content; who appears to be diligent; and who acts in a civil manner. Start this on day one of the semester,
  • Find an advisor/counselor and develop a working relationship—early.
  • Locate your professor’s offices the first week of classes. Know where they “live” on campus.  Make it a point to visit each one at least once before the end of the 2nd week of school. Be on the lookout for mentors.

Resources. You will never be in another place in your life where there are SO MANY resources dedicated to your success. Your college may have opportunities such as tutoring, financial aid, career counseling, disability services, veteran services, programs for displaced or at-risk populations, exercise programs, childcare, workshops on financial planning, and community services to name a few.  You have to do two things, however:

  • You have to know about them
  • You have to use them.

Video recommendation for the week:

Priority Management.   Remember, you cannot manage time.  What you can do—and must do—is manage your priorities. By the end of your first week of classes do, at least, the following:

  • Transfer all of your due dates (assignments, quizzes, tests, special projects) from your syllabi to your calendar.  Don’t have a calendar? Get one (paper or electronic).
  • Identify what your non-negotiables are—those things that you will not compromise away. The things you will always make sure to address. Place these on your calendar.
  • Get rid of three words: Try, But and Can’t.  They are demotivators and will take you away from your priorities.

Personal Well-being. If you don’t take care of yourself, if you do not maintain a sense of balance, how will you be able to reach your goals?

  • What are you doing to maintain your dimensions of well-being?
  • Make your well-being part of your non-negotiables—and block out time on your weekly priority management list.
  • Your relationships and campus resources can help (see above).

Success is the product of small yet consistent choices you make and do each day. You don’t “start college” the first day you walk on campus. Get ready before the first day of classes.  Consider the four areas above; make a goal in each area today. Develop a plan, today. Get your “game face” on.

Make it the best semester of your life!

Enjoy your week—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On August 5, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: It Takes More than Academics to Succeed in College.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) along to friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in Student success | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Comments

(#165) Thriving with Change: A Simple Model

Posted on July 21, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

Change is cyclical. It repeats, continues, endures,
and follows us wherever we go.  Rather than curse it, let’s
understand how to thrive with it.

Recognizing that we live in a world of profound change is no longer a profound statement. Statistics from Worldometers (http://www.worldometers.info/) remind us that our world is one of unrelenting and constant movement.  Consider the following items I extracted from Worldometers on July 18 at 10:45 a.m. Each of these figures represents the number (rounded by me) for the entire year (up until July 18):

  • New book titles published: 1.3 million
  • Blogs posts written: 806 million
  • TV sets sold: 141 million
  • Computers sold: 191 million
  • Cell phones sold: 1 billion
  • Emails sent: 92 trillion

These statistics can take us in a number of directions: passing of the traditional bound book; rising importance of social media; number of people accessing information on the go and on their handheld devices. And more.

OK. That change is not going away is obvious.  So, for the purpose of this post, let’s consider how we deal with change. More specifically, let’s examine how we can thrive in an environment of change by applying a simple four-step model.

Image: tiverylucky/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: tiverylucky/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Martha Beck in her bestselling book Finding Your Own North Star wrote about the cycle of change. This reminds us that change is a cyclical. It is not something we address once—and then it goes away. Oh no!  It repeats, continues, endures, and follows us wherever we go.  Rather than curse it, let’s understand how to thrive with it.

I explained this model at the Noel-Levitz Conference on Student Recruitment, Marketing, and Retention last week. I used it in the context of helping students thrive and persist toward their collegiate and career dreams.  You can apply it to any phase of your life.

  • Recognize.  The first thing you have to do is have an awareness that what you are doing now is no longer working like it once did. Perhaps it is a relationship that needs tweaking—or ending.  A job that has grown weary. Or a pace of life that is no longer sustainable.  Whatever the situation, the first step to change the situation is understanding that what currently exists no longer works like you want it to work. You understand something must change—and you must be the agent for that change.
  • Plan. Once you have come to terms with the fact that you need to make a change, it’s time to prepare for the change.  What do you need to do to affect the change you want to see? What resources do you need? Who can help you? When will you start—and when will you reach your destination? How will you measure your progress? This critical stage helps us visualize what we need to do, how we will do it, with whom we will do it, and when we will do it. You marshal your resources.

Video recommendation of the week:

  • Execute. Great!  You have awareness for the need to change. You have a plan.  Now, you got to take action.  A great plan won’t do you much good if it is not acted upon.  A dream without legs is little more than a fantasy.  When will you take action?  How about today? Once you put your plan into action, be prepared for obstacles, setbacks, and detours. That is the nature of life.  I call it the “glitch factor.”  Be prepared. Be persistent. Be observant. And be ready to make needed course corrections. Embrace and learn from the journey.
  • Enjoy. Your hard work and dedication have paid off.  Even with the bumps and turns of the road, you have persevered and created the change you envisioned in steps one and two.

Guess what. Soon you will confront another situation (or even the same one) that requires tweaking. The cycle repeats.  Different circumstance perhaps—the same steps, though, can guide you through.

So, your first step is to recognize you need to make an adjustment.  Take time today.  Start the cycle…enjoy the process. Create the life you want.

Enjoy your week—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On August 5, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: It Takes More than Academics to Succeed in College.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) along to friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in change | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

(#164) Nurturing the Optimal Experience for Students and Employees

Posted on July 14, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

The only thing we are truly sure of is what is in the present.
As Leo Buscaglia said years ago, “Yesterday is a canceled check;
tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have
– so spend it wisely.”

 In his book Flow, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi delineates five characteristics that promote optimal experience for children and, thus, have a lasting impact on how the children develop (p. 88-89).

  • Clarity. Goals and expectations are clearly stated.
  • Centering.  The parents stay grounded in the present with what the child is doing. They are not, for instance, focused on what college their kindergartener will be going to in 12 years. Savor the moment. Feedback is powerfully important.
  • Choice. Parents allow, and the child has internalized, that options exist for them. Life is not regimented in all aspects, shapes and forms.  A sense of self-efficacy is nurtured.
  • flowCommitment. An atmosphere of trust allows the child to stretch boundaries such that the child can commit to the experience at hand (enjoy the present; in the flow) and not focus on “What happens if I fail? How will I look to others? Will my parents still love me?”
  • Challenge. The parents present opportunities for the child to stretch and, yes, even fail. They aren’t always there to “protect” them from failure. Feedback comes in many forms.

As I read, I thought how each of these characteristics goes beyond family rearing practices.  They go to the heart or what creates optimal experiences in the workplace and classroom environments. Effective leaders help to create these conditions. Consider:

  • Clarity.  The mission is clear. Goals understood. Expectations stated. The teacher and students have goals and expectations. The supervisor and employee have the same. They need to be articulated with clear communication.
  • Centering.  While the classroom and workplace is goal oriented (what are we wanting to accomplish?), there remains a clear connection to the present.  Savor the experience in front of us. The only thing we are truly sure of is what is in the present. As Leo Buscaglia said years ago, “Yesterday is a canceled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have – so spend it wisely.” This present will create our future. Embrace it.
  • Choice. As a teacher, I set out the expectations for the course. Students (with encouragement and coaching) establish their course goals.  Life is about choices—and consequences. Possibilities always exist. In the workplace, supervisors understand
    the need to allow their employees to explore and experiment.  This does not just happen; it has to be nurtured over time.
  • Commitment. Effective teachers and workplace supervisors create an environment for experimentation.  A lock-step “this-is-how-we-do-things-around-here” mentality gives way to a “what-better-options-may-exist” mindset.
  • Challenge. When the previous four characteristics exist, it becomes easier to create and maintain an atmosphere that stretches our students and employees.  They are not fearful of how it affects an arbitrary grade or a once-a-year performance evaluation.  They understand that if they aren’t failing, they aren’t stretching.

Video recommendation for the week:

What is “flow“?

What can you do this week to encourage these five characteristics for those you coach and mentor? I’d love to learn from you.

Enjoy your week—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On July 15, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Fostering Civility and Nurturing an Attitude of Gratitude.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) along to friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in leadership | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

(#163) Foster Civility-Nurturing Gratitude

Posted on July 7, 2013 by Steve Piscitelli

Make the world a better place this week with
one more act of civility and one more act of gratitude.

In preparation for an upcoming webinar, I reacquainted myself with some excellent books. Each one has timely—if not “timeless”—strategies to create a more civil world for ourselves and those around us.

For today, I will pull one key takeaway from each work and relate to our topic of fostering civility and nurturing gratitude. I encourage you to dig deeper into one or more of these works for more effective exercises and strategies.

*Achor, Shawn. The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuels Success    and Performance at Work.

  • The research suggests “…consistently grateful people are more energetic, emotionally intelligent, forgiving, and less likely to be depressed, anxious, or lonely.” We have to practice looking for the good—and we have to practice it consistently.
  • How do YOU practice appreciating the good things that happen in YOUR life?
Image: Stuart Miles/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: Stuart Miles/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

*Adele, Deborah.  The Yamas and Niyamas: Exploring Yoga’s Ethical Practice.

  • Do we practice non-violence? Adele reminds us that “…our ability to be nonviolent to others is directly related to our ability to be nonviolent within ourselves…to do no harm.”
  • What can YOU do to reclaim peace within yourself?

*Forni, P.M. Choosing Civility: The Twenty-five Rules of Considerate Conduct.

  • Do we act with integrity toward others? Forni sets forth twenty-five rules for civil conduct.
  • What rules of civility do YOU practice and model?

*Lee, John. The Anger Solution: The Proven Method for Achieving Calm and Developing Healthy, Long- Lasting Relationships.

  • Have we established boundaries and limits in our lives—and do others know they exist? If we don’t announce these, how can we get mad if someone violates them?
  • What are YOUR boundaries? What are YOUR limits?

*Leider, Richard and David A. Shapiro. Repacking Your Bags: Lighten Your Load for the Rest of Your Life.

  • Who are the nutritious people in your life?  Note them and thank them.
  • Are YOU a nutritious person?
Image: imagerymajestic/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: imagerymajestic/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Video recommendation for the week:

*Orloff, Judith. Positive Energy: 10 extraordinary prescriptions for transforming.

  • Nutritious people may be wonderful but what about those toxic people in our lives who test the limits of civility? Watch out for the energy vampires in our lives.
  •  Are YOU an energy vampire?

*Ruiz, Don Miguel. The Four Agreements: A Toltec Wisdom Book.

  • What guides your life? His first agreement—Be Impeccable with Your Word—speaks directly to civility.
  • How do YOU, as Ruiz states, “use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love”?

Make the world a better place this week with one more act of civility and one more act of gratitude.

Enjoy your week—and H.T.R.B. as needed!

On July 15, I will offer my next webinar. The topic: Fostering Civility and Nurturing an Attitude of Gratitude.   Take advantage of this complementary offering.  Click here to register now for the webinar.  Or go to my website for registration information. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post. Please share it (and any of the archived posts on this site) along to friends and colleagues. You also can follow me on Twitter, LinkedIn, and Facebook. If you get a chance, visit my Facebook page and join in–or start–a conversation (www.facebook.com/stevepiscitelli).  If you have suggestions for future posts, leave a comment. Make it a wonderful week!

 ©2013. Steve Piscitelli

Posted in boundaries and limits, Civility, Gratitude | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments