This blog has an underlying theme of community building. Community as a Safe Place to Land evolved from posts about dialogues, collective monologues, collaboration, energy vampires, leaders, flibbertigibbets, and more.

This post presents an alternative perspective on the importance and impact of creating a space where others can be authentically seen, heard, debated, and respected.

Allow me to introduce you to The MeTones and The WeTones.

The MeTones have a difficult time not talking about themselves, ever. No matter what the topic, event, or issue, they immediately consider themselves the gift in the room. And, they have to make sure you know it, ad nauseam.

Maybe you’ve come across a MeTone on social media. Someone shares a post about something, like an illness. Jake responds, “So sorry to hear that. But it ain’t nothing like my issue…” Later that day, Jake meets his friends for their monthly lunch. After exchanging greetings, the conversation shifts to a monologue by Jake, as it often does.

If Jake had a band, an apt name would be Little Jake and the MeTones. You see, most things (everything?) are about Jake. It’s hard for him to go 2 or 3 sentences without saying “I” or “me” or “my”. You probably could list a few MeTones you know. (Go ahead…pause for a moment. Do you know any MeTones?)

The WeTones, on the other hand, live for listening, sharing, and having authentic exchanges. They recognize the people in front of them as the gifts in the room. Sure, they add personal information as appropriate, but they keep coming back to the other people. Not for narcissistic reasons but out of respect.

A few examples.

Long-time close friend and professional musician, Mike Shackelford, hosted our community’s Songwriters Night for over twenty years. When he took the stage at these events, he always focused on supporting the person standing at the mic. This created a musical safe place and community treasure. Roy Peak followed Shack and serves as the host. He, too, has a master skill of placing others first. They foster a WeTone culture.

Roz, a neighborhood friend known for her gregarious nature and ready smile, has a talent for conversation. This is central for WeTones. While Roz isn’t shy about sharing her opinion, she will engage you in a real dialogue. It’s about the group. It’s about connecting. It’s about the others in the room. Introducing Little Roz and the WeTones!

Our previous dog, Roxie, and I served as a pet therapy team for about five years. We traveled to hospice facilities, the local hospital, schools, and the Jacksonville International Airport. Our visits were never about me; the focus was on the people. They wanted to love on Roxie—and she truly enjoyed that! The main point was the people in the room. Many times, as people rubbed Roxie’s belly, they began talking about their own dog, their illness, their joy, or their anxiety. The visit was about them—a moment to pause for smiles, comfort, and peace. WeTones!

The WeTones build bridges for collaboration and support. Who are your WeTones, and how can you help build a WeTone culture?

~~~~~

You will find more about me at www.stevepiscitelli.com.

And you can still order:

• My first novel, The Voice in Your Ear, was released on September 17, 2024. You can order the book (e-book or print copy) here. If you’d like to hear the song I wrote and recorded as the soundtrack for the book, click here. (P.S. Thank you for taking a chance on a “first-time” novelist.)
• Sharing Wisdom Across the Ages: From Elementary School to Retirement (eBook and paperback versions) was released on January 1, 2023. Click here for more information.
• Roxie Looks for Purpose Beyond the Biscuit (2020) is availablein eBook and paperback formats. Click here.
• Community as a Safe Place to Land (2019, print and e-book) is available on Amazon. The above link provides more information (including seven free podcast episodes spotlighting the book’s seven core values).
• Stories about Teaching: No Need to be an Island (2017, print and e-book). Available on Amazon. One college’s new faculty onboarding program used the scenarios in this book. The accompanying videos could stimulate community-building conversations at the beginning of a meeting.

All photos by Steve Piscitelli (©®)

©2025. Steve Piscitelli
The Growth and Resilience Network®
Atlantic Beach, Florida