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Sometimes the numbers just add up. And occasionally the numbers tell an interesting story. Like the number 100. Let me explain.
For those who follow this blog, you may remember my post of February 13, 2011 titled “Happy Valentine’s Day: The First 35 Years.” That post was a celebration of 35 years of marriage with my bride, Laurie. At that time, I wrote
For us, there is no secret; no formula. We have had our difficulties like all others.
Heck, truth be told, we didn’t know what we were getting into. We didn’t have a
checklist of what we wanted or were looking for. But, if you held me down to provide
a secret; I’d say it is simply giving each other space…But mostly the reason for our
success and longevity is that I “married up”….!
This weekend, my wife and I got together with four college friends–two married couples–to celebrate 100 years of marriage. You see, in addition to our 35 years together, Jeanne and Scott have 33 years, and Brian and Eileen total 32 years. Add them up–yep–100 years of marriage.
We decided to do our own renewal of vows. So we all met on Anna Maria Island 
(southwest coast of Florida) for a weekend of memories, laughs, good food, old college photos (did I already mention “laughs”?), and a hearty dose of appreciation for what we have in each other as spouses and as friends. Kind of like our 2011 version of the Big Chill.
On our last evening, we gathered on a rooftop deck overlooking the Gulf of Mexico and 
shared words, music, and sentiments about what we meant to one another. I want to share a few of the lines Laurie and I repeated; words from “The Art of A Good Marriage” by Wilferd A. Peterson. Simple yet elegant, these words spoke to our hearts.
Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.
A good marriage must be created…
It is establishing a relationship, in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal…
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.
The words reminded me of the “work” a relationship takes. Sometimes we are fortunate to cross paths and share our lives with very special people. That is something to be thankful for (and I AM)–but there are no guarantees. The relationships take daily work. Peterson said it well when he wrote that a marriage does not just happen. There is a reminder for us in that beyond marriage, as well. Whether it is a corporate team, a college class project, or a neighborhood friendship it is about being the right person.
I thank God for being blessed with the right people…and pray I do better each day to be the right person myself.
© 2011. Steve Piscitelli and Steve Piscitelli’s Blog.
The Growth and Resilience Network® 
As I said to Eileen–three of my favorite couples! Having known you all for the past thirty years I can say that your marriages are an inspiration to others. Congratulations!
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As are you, my lady, as are you!
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Some nice “words” Mr. Piscitelli!!! You are ” right on” about marriage and the work it takes. Also, being that “right” person is key!
Thanks for your friendship.
Dutts
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Same to you, Dutts!
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100 years of marriage is “GREAT”, beacause the marriages these days are not even making the 1 year mark. I really do believe a marriage is what you make it, when both of you have time with each other, time from each other, communication, trust, faithfullness, stability, and finance. So you just have to put in what you want out it.
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It is great!
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Congrats! As a single mother, I would hope to have such a loving, long lasting marriage as that. But as a young person, values are totally different from years past, and there are not many willing to be the” right partner”. Reading great examples, such as yours, will hopefully influence other people to reach for strong union.
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Part of it, I believe, is that we “become the right partner” as we evolve in our skins and in our relationship.
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I was talking with my dad one day and I asked him, ” Dad how did you overcome disagreements in the marriage of Thirty eight years?” He said, “Son there is no such thing as a perfect relationship or marriage. So I have two words of advice for a long term marriage:
YES DEAR.
And that goes both ways son.”
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Respect! 🙂
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I was thinking the other day what type of marriage I would love to have.I would want me and my husband to be best friends first.If we had a true friendship we should have no problem making it to our 100 years of marriage.
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Enjoy and grow with each and every year.
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I absolutely love he concept of 100 years of marriage that you chose. That is basically the only way to callaberate being married for 100 years. The fact that anygood relationship starts with you is key. You inspire others to hold true to building positive relationships & Congratulations!!
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It is a rarity these days to see a couple let along a group of friends that can celebrate more than 25 years of marriage. I do believe that you and your bride are a shining example of what hard work, dedication, and compromise can produce.
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This is truly an inspiring mile-stone, indeed. To make a relationship work within itself is difficult, to make it last 10 years is a challenge. But in the end, to have made it even a year with an intimately-loving relationship shows dedication. I know I will do whatever it takes to last as long with my fiancé.
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Very inspirational story, my grandparents has been married now for over 50 years. Congrats to you and your wife for having a long lasting beautiful relationship and I hope me and my husband will have a long lasting marriage as well.
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It takes work and respect…. 🙂
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